Please post on the board any time you want to talk, and there will always be someone here to listen.

Most all of us have been in your shoes . . . I lost my first westie after only 4 years of having her with us -- even though she was older, it almost destroyed my husband and me to have her put to sleep. She was SO precious and brought so much joy to our lives -- I grieved for about 6 weeks -- just brokenhearted -- then I said to my husband, "What do you think about --" and before I could finish the sentence, he said "YES!" We got a westie puppy. And I must say, I got Pattie as an older adult and a puppy was NOTHING like Pattie -- AND there were times when I pushed Dixie aside and "blamed" her for not being Pattie! But once we got over the "terrible twos" -- Dixie is the best thing that could have happened to us to help us cope with losing our best friend.

ALSO, I lost my ten year old collie, Peaches Saturday. Very suddenly -- she just died. I just posted on the message board today about my new foster dog, a westie named Wesley -- he is about one year old. Last night I was laughing at his antics and feeling good and then I began to feel guilty for feeling happy because I felt I still should feel bad because of Peaches' death. But, ironically, today a dear friend sent me a newsletter regarding pet grief -- and it said that in most cases the best way to deal with the death of a pet is to get another one quickly! They acknowledged that it sounded outrageous, but it really did help with the healing process AND you will be giving a dog a wonderful home -- not betraying your love from Chelsea (or Peaches).

I truly believe Chelsea would not want you to grief yourself sick over her . . . after all, you had to have loved her beyond compare -- so why not give that love to another animal who needs it so desparately?

Reading your post just makes me ache for your hurting -- I hope this helps and I am going to email you that article about pet grief tomorrow!

Until then, please know that I will be thinking of you -- I hope something that I said will help you cope with losing your angel. If not, please do know that time will heal your broken heart.

Just think of the wonderful times you had with Chelsea. Imagine her playing with all that have gone over the bridge before her.

There is a support group at the Animal Medical Center in Manhattan. I know people who have gone and it has helped them.

We are all here for you.

I decided to have my 15yr. old Peke-a-Poo Mandy put to sleep last year in February. It was an agonizing decision....I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep and I cried almost non-stop. I had to leave work several times because I would just break down.

After it was over, I felt such peace over my decision, but also felt such a void. How was I going to live (I was single) by myself without her. She'd been by my side for 15 yrs. She was my child and everyone thought of her that way.
Take your time to grieve, but understand that there comes a time that you must make the choice to move on. That doesn't mean that you won't think about Chelsea all the time, but now I can think about Mandy and smile. You will get to that point in time.

The thing that helped me was having a new puppy in the house. Nick was such a handful, but it gave me a new life to nurture and care for. I wasn't trying to replace Mandy, because she could never be replaced, but I was moving on. I needed to have that and it was so good for me.

It is okay to grieve - its important to grieve, but it is also important to celebrate life.

The following is my very favorite poem, and I have it framed with a photo of Cindar - our old gal...

I hope you find comfort in the following poem and peace in the following days, weeks, months and years...

Goodbye My Friend

They will not go quietly,
the dogs who've shared our lives.
In subtle ways they let us know
their spirit still survives.
Old habits still make us think
we hear a barking at the door.
Or step back when we drop
a tasty morsel on the floor.
Our feet still go around the place
the food dish used to be,
And, sometimes, coming home at night,
we miss them terribly.
And although time may bring new friends
and a new food dish to fill.
That one place in our hearts
belongs to them...
...and always will.

If things don't start to improve for you soon, please consider professional help. A member of your family has died. You have a right to grieve. But you also have a right to live. If you find you can't seem to get through this, please look for outside help.

Also, why not write down some of your favorite Chelsea stories? Write a book if you want to. After a while, you'll spend so much time reveling in her life and celebrating her life that your focus shifts from missing her to celebrating her. We did that when Nick was euthanized. (He had a heart attack in my lap on the way to emergency vets.) My father and Nick had a deeper relationship than most people do with one another. It helped him to remember and focus on the good times. Give it a try.

I hope you feel better soon. I understand how you feel, and I'm so very sorry for your loss.

I love Marin so much, and she is the only one I have. Someday, I must go through what you have gone through, and we can never be "ready" to face this until it really comes.

Hugs,